The Psychology of Winning 

by Denis Waitley

From the Audio Book Publisher

"The Psychology of Winning 
Author: Denis Waitley 
Date: 01-JAN-1987 
Narrator: Denis Waitley 
Provider: Nightingale-Connant 
Running Time: 3 h 51 min 

The best selling audiobook of all time by the world's foremost producer of personal development and motivational audio programs. There is often only a small difference between the top leaders in every field and those who merely "do-well." In The Psychology of Winning, Denis Waitley offers simple, yet profound principles of thought and healthy behavior that guide men and women to the top in every field of endeavor...principles that give you the winning edge in every situation. With Waitley's expert training, you will finally be able to: transform your high expectations into real outcomes; concentrate on your desires and the rewards of success instead of fear and failure, and visualize and act on winning situations to guarantee your success."

Notes for Editing

This audio presentation supports my written goals of …(write them down now)

etc.

(Transcribe below, those personal goals that you will help to achieve through listening to this audio presentation. For example I use goal setting and review strategies. I strive for continual intellectual growth. I operate from the abundance paradigm. I bring substantial value to the market place. I provide valuable project management services. I lead effectively. I maintain an effective lifestyle.)

These notes might provide a suitable basis for note taking during the audio presentation. The notes require editing, formatting, prioritising amongst other things.

Psychology for self achievement in life

Life is a real game, the clock is always running, no replays.

Spectators or bystanders?

Lowers tend to want to achieve the goal but without the effort

Winners put it together in mind, body heart and spirit.

The five attitudinal qualities

The five action qualities.

Get on with the game of life – becoming a total winner.

Optimism is expecting the best results

Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy

Faith conquers all

Examples of greatness – you also are amongst the winners

Success is in the way you spend the minutes

The expectations of others close to you.

In your own expectations for yourself

• psycho – mind
• soma – body
• Positive self expectancy
• Actions are controlled by current obsessions
• Sickness and disease can be linked with how we associate with life
• Distress upsets out general health
• Ulcers – what is eating us
• The mind body effect – eg voodoo
• The victim is aware of the spell and is an adherent to the faith
• Positive self expectancy
• Self fulfilling prophesy
• Expect the best
• Total incurable optimism
• Want to achieve and expect to succeed
• Body produces endorphins and causes the feeling of well being.
• Positive thoughts produce endorphins
• The key is to understand what we want to achieve
• What we receive is what we expect
• Learn to stay relaxed and friendly
• In dealing with others
• Get excited about your dreams
• Don’t hand around the doom-sayers
• Surround yourself with winners

-

• we become on what we dwell on every day
• motive – that within the individual springs from inside the individual
• lasting change will take place
• move in the direction of goals

• fear is the greatest negative emotion
• desire achieves objectives
• triggers ____ of success
• I want, I can, I will
• I see opportunity
• Negative tension – fear
• Desire causes individual power
• Winners respond positively
• Dwell on the reward and move toward the goal
• Dwell on the negative consequence and move toward the penalty / consequence
• EG fittings will continue until morale improves
• Only use fear motivation when danger is eminent.
• Winners see risk as opportunity.
• People dominated by stress cannot change their world.
• Burning desire is the antidote to fear.
• Put things in their proper perspective.
• Have a high degree of motivation

- drive and persistence.

• Need leads to desire which leads to the will to win.
• Motivation through fear stops desire
• Fear stops, desire goes
• Motivate through the desire for success rather than the penalty of failure
• Expanding opportunities – solutions make desire your currently dominating thought.
• Look for the answers
• Make choices
• Earn respect
• Learn from the past
• Make and keep commitments
• Winning is a habit

• replace can’t with can
• replace try with will
• focus all attention on the current objective
• list your five desires and the payoffs
• give solution oriented feedback
• seek out people that are already doing that which is your goal
• repeat – I want to… I can…

• Imagination rules the world
• Develop a positive self image
• Give yourself a preview of your success
• How you feel about yourself – the key to human behaviour
• Self image lingers on after reality has changed
• Children’s self images are pliable
• Our self image invites its response
• Our self images are "correct"
• We cannot erase the old images – we can over write the images
• Subconscious – the level of awareness – the robot – the goal seeking auto pilot.
• The rational mind – the judge – conscious – conscious seeks response from the sub conscious.
• Achievement is consistent with self image
• Change the self image - elevate it and enlarge the universe
• All actions are referred to the robot.
• Experiences are all filed away for future reference – registers the pattern in the brain.
• Vividly imagined events have the same effect as real events.
• Our prejudices are stored.
• We are a slave to our subconscious
• We must change our self image first
• Behaviour is consistent with the self image
• Self image is the achievement mechanism
• See yourself in the winners circle – in advance - vividly picture the rewards
• Think win with the positive self image - see through winners eyes

Exercise For 20 minutes per day imagine yourself vividly achieving your goals – personal, relational, preview the goals being achieved

• Read or listen to a biography each month in an area of your profession or goals, or in a hobby area
• Listen quietly and relax each week to let the subconscious get into action, inspirational mood music
• Creative imagination rules

• a game plan for life - where am I going
• goal and role oriented, self directed
• goals worthwhile to the individual and other people
• goal oriented system – stay on target, by design
• homing device, set the goal, subconscious robot monitors progress and makes corrections to stay on target
• Winners have a definite purpose, need to see the goals, need to be specific and realistic and have a definite purpose.
• Read Victor Frankyl’s biography
• Behaviour of captors and captives - search for meaning and human purpose, survivors had a purpose for their existence
• Responses that are consistent with our purpose – eg accountable for life
• Life is expecting a contribution from us - what is my contribution
• If you don’t stand for something you may fall for anything.
• Vivid dreams repeated become goals - internalised spiritual conviction - goals are the action plan - commitment
• Find ways to made goals come true.
• We move in the direction of our currently dominant thoughts.
• Retired people without meaningful goals live an average of 7 years after retirement. Consider a second career or goals - this is an abundant world, set yourself free, we must have a dream to make it come true. See from within. Ships decide on a destination and chart a course, keep repeating the corrective actions
• Take time and discipline to make and execute a plan

Types of Goals

• Lifetime goals
• As soon as possible goals - character and attitude
• A 5 year Plan - time priority goals
• A 1 Year program
• A 6 month campaign, weekly, daily
• Avoid majoring in minor things
• Corporations have clear plans
• For winning we need a plan, a list of priorities, plan for tomorrow, make a list of priorities for tomorrow. Think of goal achieving rather than tension relieving
• Focus on goal achieving - not tension relieving
• Review the priority list – like a grocery list, check off accomplished goals and add new ones. You are the sum of your thoughts
• Yesterdays dreams are today’s necessities

Winning Self Direction

• Setting profitable and specific goals
• like an auto pilot what your get is what you set as specific goals
• What would give you the greatest happiness – my goal is to … (be specific)
• Set goals for your self – clearly defined, written - what would give you fulfilment and happiness
• Written and reviewed often, imagined in vivid detail.
• Share goals only with positive supported people. Big successes require big dreamers. We become what we think about in positive terms. Let the subconscious do its magic work. Work on a single goal at a time. Turn imagination into reality. Nourish the dreams
• Move forward a day at a time, do one thing well at a time.

The winning attitude of Positive Self Control

• Winners make it happen - you take responsibility for your life
• Want to win, be in control of it and make it happen - the key - do it to yourself
• Self control leads -> responsibility for our own self – the freedom to choose
• The escape goat – in OT times a scape goat was used. – blaming things on external factors - the old blame list.
• Try to work our what is going on within - the answer lies within
• What you send out you will get back eventually.
• Our attitude – how we choose to respond - it is our responsibility
• Winners make the decisions quickly – they know where they are going.
• What kind of life would you choose to spend your efforts on - minds are made up automatically - moving toward goals.
• Children learn quickly how to control their parents.
• We are not victims of fate. People who have to do things usually are not happy with this. We choose the kind of life we live.
• We can control our body functions such as body temperature, heart rate, brain waves, etc for positive health maintenance.
• Many of these functions are subconscious rather than involuntary - bio feedback
• We do that for which we are rewarded
• We are steering our ships
• Responsible self control leads to mental and physical health
• Responsibility psychology - for present actions, it is all a choice
• We are responsible for present actions and future performance. Do not dwell on the past.
• We choose to do things that are profitable and good. – beneficial
• Things to move you toward your goals - purpose -> pleasure -> well being
• Pursue self development – a bright new world to discover.- John Gardener - self renewal
• Be aware of the restrictions we make for ourselves.
• We are responsible for our choices – widen our choices – expand our associations and inputs. We set restrictions of our own making
• Assert your option to choose – personal responsibility – there is no liberty without responsibility – the law of cause and effect - the ruler in our lives
• Be aware of limiting our input and the ideas through associates and the path of least resistance

• You are the driver
• eliminate "I have to…"
• list alternatives to current habits
• take credit or blame/responsibility for decisions openly
• affirm self talk - rewards will match my service
• learn how to relax - learn to use biofeedback
• initiate some actions – letters and phone calls on your own behalf
• winners make it happen

• practice paying the price of winning
• persistent self discipline - walk the talk
• changing – we are often held back by the current self image – the existing habits have been there a long time, the little robot has some big habits
• Habits are attitudes that grow from cobwebs to cables
• Make winning your habit, a permanent habit
• Do within when doing without - mental practice to over write the old
• The new inputs reinforce
• Imagine vividly – visualisation - fanaticise, act out in advance
• Mind achieves the currently dominant thought vivid images
• Commit to memory - the visualisation and emotions that can over ride the subconscious
• Create the brand new self image – it works for athletes, the simulation masters through repetition, words, pictures, concepts and emotions.
• Build on the successes, visualise and simulate every day
• Winning self discipline – astronauts use mental simulations and repetition, the steps the sequences.
• Practice the sequence with eyes closed
• The winning edge - the way to conquer fear
• Take successes and build on them - Repetition and vivid simulation
• PoWs returning from Vietnam - discipline and action
• Developed habits in spite of deprivation - made crude guitars and keyboards
• Positive discipline - a self improvement retreat
• Musical exercises, physical exercises
• The imaginary golf game while prisoners of war
• Reinforcement of success and pre-enforcement of future success - mental exercises
• Do it right in practice and you will do it right in life. - in one's imagination never miss

- Simulation is the greatest tool in the universe of the prisoner of war and hostage, kept mental diaries

1. Winning - use simulation and repetition every day
2. There is a winners behavioural cycle, review, change, refine - self talk
3. Rehearse every important act in your mind - elevate our best self image, replay and review. Doing within while you're doing without
4. Set aside some time and relax and refresh - program the subconscious, refresh and coach
5. Repetitive self talk is one key to winning self discipline

• Win every win that you seek in the game of life

• I like myself - I am glad I'm me - the feeling of one's own worth
• Positive self talk, self worth and self confidence, visualisation of self worth
• Encouraged, nurtured and coached, learn to like self through practice
• Positive encouragement of associates, out of adversity comes greatness
• Performing in society on our own
• Out of adversity can come greatness
• Aggressors and criminals are often losers
• Pass our valuable service on to others
• Top producers feel good about themselves, the measurement of success lies in estimation of self worth
• Self development is a lifetime program
• Low achievers seem to cultivate the seeds of inferior feelings taking the paths of no change - the also-rans and low achievers
• Be controlled by internal standards - success will become a part of your lifestyle. Learning brings change.
• Humility is serving others with value
• Competition is not wrong
• The love of money is the root of all evil
• Make efforts that set an example
• Earn as much as you can and benefit others as much as you can.
• Financial wealth is the result of our success - the results of our productivity
• Compare ourselves with our own selves, and success, abilities and goals
• Emotions are the responsibility of their owners - move to action through logic and common sense
• Develop and maintain high self esteem in the present
• Real winners accept themselves as they are at this moment
• Practice the positive, be one's self, live life as it unfolds
• Self talk - set new and higher standards, use constructive self talk

• willingness to be one's self
• relentless positive self talk
• words and thoughts effect body functions
• control the language we use on ourselves
• winners say: I want to, I can, I choose, I'll do it.
• Accept compliments with thanks
• Avoid humorous self humiliation - the robot sub conscious cannot tell the difference, and are stored as fact
• Have and display positive self esteem for any value that is paid to you

Keys

1. Keep self talk affirmative - our implied opinion of self
2. Accept compliments with thanks
3. Dress and look your best
4. Volunteer your own name first in phone calls or when meeting people for the first time
5. Sit up front in meetings
6. Walk tall and at a faster pace
7. Feel good about yourself
8. set your own internal standards
9. have an ongoing development program
10. remember your own worth, take pride in accomplishments and who you are at present

• love yourself first, before you can love and respect others
• treat others the same with respect, integrity and care
• look beyond yourself for meaning in life, put it all together as a whole person
• life is a work of art - a big picture
• earn the love and respect of others, build up and help
• offer a strong hand to help
• create other winners - contribute without exploiting
• The inner circle, the family
• Make these relationships valuable and precious
• Care about where you live and your community
• Balance - family - relationships - finance, family, relationships, community
• Work and contribute
• Adolf Hitler used positive self dimension to do-it-to-others - a great human tragedy
• Rather, practice win / win - we both win together
• Treat the environment with care - understand the delicate balance - cherish and put back as much as you consume, take care of our future
• Draw upon the spiritual power woven into our being
• Live each precious day in harmony with the divine universe
• Learn from the past, build for the future
• Have a value of time - the ultimate ruler of our lives - we get no time-outs or replays - the clock never stops, take a new look at yourself
• Learn from the close encounters - our bodies are mortal - mature and adapt to age
• Look at the rose buds opening each day - take time to play - take time with loved ones and old people, to relish your work
• Take time to read - the fountain of wisdom
• Take time for our health - a precious gift
• Take time for love, look for the good, and encourage to be all that we can be
• Learn from the past, change is inevitable, and enjoy successes
• Live in the present, "now" you can have some control over
• Focus and work diligently and efficiently on that which is important
• Play, exercise and stay focused
• (End of disk 2)
• relish and enjoy, learn from the past and enjoy successes with relaxed and intense focus
• don't live in the future, live in the present and now
• super achievers focus on now, change is inevitable
• now and it is gone - make life last - what is important in your life
• life is a game to make last and best, to help to create other winners
• improve every day - how do I fit in
• win / win , if nature wins, we all win - step back and get a perspective
• set some goals that will benefit others, if nature wins we all win
• live well for yourself so that you can give yourself away to benefit others

• awareness of life - three concentric circles of life - full of interactions
• Outer - the arena outside of self - leisure activities, education, experience, getting and giving - full of abundance everywhere
• Physical - the arena of the physical - more abundance, health, welfare, good food and fuel, take care of it so it will serve - we depend upon good health
• Mental - inner most arena - the mental brain and central nervous system, we use only about 1% of our creative capacity through processes
• what resists and stops us - laziness, limited self awareness, self honesty, fear, lack or awareness, self-honesty, negative self attitudes
• think feel and do congruently - consistently
• be open to new ideas and see many alternatives, be tuned in and turned on
• winners are open - relative rather than absolute - new opportunities
• self awareness, acceptance of our uniqueness - open mindedness - how good that is
• we think at different frequencies
• quest for mental and physical self awareness - we hear different drummers
• empathy - to walk a mile in the others shoes before passing judgment
• changing - growing imperfect but amazing living creation
• adaptability the key to key to survival and success
• cope with and adapt to changing society - relax and cope
• over reacting to what is happening, feelings of entrapment are negative stress and are devastating to our mental and physical health

• find our own healthy stress levels
• eg. turtles and horses - be true to one's self - make the best use of what we have, our minds, abilities and talents.
• personal honesty and integrity
• inside out
• we are the only ones from whom we can steal time, out talents and abilities
• ask is this honest? Is this true?
• Walk with truth all the days of our life - and be open to better alternatives to win.
• Get out of your tranquil rut. Change your attitude and behaviour

• list your ten assets and ten liabilities, work on the top 3 liabilities
• Take 15 minutes each day to relax, reflect and enjoy the abundance

• Winners are examples of this - aura, presence, charisma
• naturally open and friendly
• a smile - the warm glow that comes from the inside out.
• first impressions are powerful People respond to gut level feeling
• people respond to the gut level feelings which are nearly instantaneous. our own encoding and decoding system
• our sub conscious uses its own encoding and decoding system
• Winners always look their best - put their best foot forward, we project our internal feelings, look good and be successful in life. The clock is always running.
• We have no choice about our genes - enhance what we have, learn to be satisfied with our own internal value, avoid self indulgence.
• True winners project success with what they have and what they can offer
• Good grooming. Good looking people are often treated better.
• When introducing yourself - lead by stating your name first, extend your hand first, maintain direct eye contact, relax and smile.
• We project our internal feelings - look good and project success in life.
• Active listening - listening to learn a lot. Feedback for clarity and understanding
• Winners ask questions and pay value to others
• I'll make them glad they talked with me. Be satisfied with yourself
• Have the other person's interest in mind.
• Who you are speaks loudly - non verbal communication - subconscious keys and feelings
• Watch the eyes, note the tone of voice and tremor. Listen to the whole person
• Use the KISS principle - words and examples, make it easy to understand
• I appreciate and understand, find something you care for and admire in others - with constructive supportive ideas. We get back from people, what we give them.
• End of track 6 on Disk 3
• Relish and enjoy, learn from the past - looking in the same direction
• Do not live in the future
• Live in the present and now.
• Super achievers focus on the now
• Life is a game to make last and best, to help to create other winners
• Improve every day - how do I fit in
• Win / win if nature wind we all win
• Live well for yourself so that you can benefit others.
•  
• We have no choice about our genes - therefore enhance what you have got.
• Learn to be satisfied with our intrinsic value.
• Avoid self indulgence
• True winners project success with what they have and what they can afford.
• Good grooming,
• When introducing yourself, lead by stating your own name first.
• Extend your hand first, make direct eye contact, relaxed smile
• Active listening - listeners learn a lot
• Winners ask questions - and pay value to others
• I will make them glad they talked with me
• Have the other person's interest n mind
• Who you are speaks loudly
• Non verbal communication - the subconscious keys - feelings
• Watch the eyes, the tone of voice
• Use the KISS principle, keep it straightforward and simple
• Use clear words and examples
• Appreciate and understand
• Finding something you can admire in others
• Influence any people you care about - it is looking in the same direction that counts.
• Help others solve their problems
•  

• Awareness of life - three concentric circles
• The outermost - the arena outside of self - leisure activities, education and experience, getting and giving
• Arena of the physical: more abundance, health and welfare, good food and fuel, take care of your body and it will take care of you.
• The inner most arena - the mental: the brain and central nervous system, we use about 1% of our creative capacity, 10 billion cells
• What stops us? Laziness, limited self awareness - self honesty
• Think, feel and do congruently
• Be open to new ideas and …
• Winners are open - they view relatives rather than absolutes
• self awareness - accepting our uniqueness - we think at different frequencies.
• A quest for mental and physical self awareness - we hear different drummers
• Empathy - to walk a mile in the other persons shoes.
• Changing, growing, from imperfect
• Adaptability - the key to survival and success
• Cope and adapt to changing …
• Negative stress is devastating.

• Find our own healthy stress levels, eg turtles and horses
• Be true to yourself
• Personal honesty and integrity
• Inside out
• We are the only ones from whom we can steal time
• Ask yourself, is this honest? Is this real?
• Walk with truth all the days of our life
• Get out of your tranquil rut.

• List your 10 assets and 10 liabilities, and work on the top 3 liabilities.
• Take 15 minutes per day each day, to relax, reflect and enjoy the abundance.

1. The Attitude of Positive Self Expectancy
   
2. The Action Quality of Positive Self Motivation
   use desire, the rewards of success, project …
3. Project the winning attitude of Positive Self Image
   change the self image to bring about the change - like a thermostat
4. Project Specific Goals of Positive Self Direction
   Lifetime goals, as soon as possible goals, time priority goals
5. Projecting a winning attitude of Positive Self Control
   
6. Project a Winning Attitude of Positive Self Discipline
   
7. Project an Attitude of Positive Self Esteem
   use positive self talk - your own self worth
8. Project Beyond Self - Positive Self Dimension
   profit from the past, live in the now - a spirit of the double win
9. Project and Understanding of true awareness in life
   Tune in on abundance
10. Project Self with winning communication to others - be responsible for sending and receiving messages

• Play to win every single day - your Olympic competition every day
• Winning in the 21^st century
• Depends on champions of cooperation not competition
• Survival of the wisest and mutual benefit and reason - we feed off the same main artery
• Work longer, harder and smarter
• We are interdependent now more than ever, rather than independent
• Lifestyle differences and tension - Cooperate with others because
• Gap between the developed nations
• Rising expectations among the developed nations
• Shrinking world - communication and transportation
• Winning teamwork is the answer, the stage is set.
• Surviving our success - we need synergy
• The takers in society increase and outnumber the givers or contributors
• Societies that fail - they fail to love and give to the group - insufficient team effort on the part of the takers, and ongoing commitment.
• Enjoy and contribute to the beneficial goals
• Too many takers and the bill becomes un-payable - we need team players
• The me first generation - is not OK - it's dead wood and dead wrong
• Take care of others, have real concern for the needy
• Suppress individual ego and respect the wisdom of parents and elders, foster innovation
• He who lives with most joy wins.

1. Adapt to the 3 C's; change, complexity and competition
   stay ahead of change, more networking, more education, get user friendly with IT, be time priority conscious, maintain motivation to do a great job, run our best race, attract repeat business.
2. Winners secret - enjoy the game.
   Never work only for the money. Work # Worth. Identify your skills, include your hobby skills in your profession.
3. Tune out the bad news.
   Eg on TV we are over aware of bad news. TV desensitizes us to anti social behavior - the influence of repeated viewing. Be selective with TV and movies.
4. Become a life long learner.
   Half life of professions is about 4 years. Expect to change careers about 4 times in your life. Never stop learning, to remain as a valuable player and asset. Invest in skills training. You incorporated - for your own brand of excellence.
5. Become a proactive innovator.
   30% are victims, 50% are survivors or sustainers - reactive, 10% are dreamers - active but take no action, 10% are innovators - in the market, they are trend spotters and wave riders
   
   Reasons for Optimism
   - Laser fusion energy
   - turn problems into opportunities
6. Learn to be an intuitive manager
   Use the whole brain - both left and right
   the new age of creativity calls for sharpened right brain thinking
   Have the head and heart working together
7. Strive for Excellence, not perfection
   EG win 2 out of 10 might be good enough for a successful share trader.
   Have a strategy for approaching our breakthrough goal - fill an existing niche.
   Be prepared to sell new ideas to an indifferent world.
   Do not hesitate and do not give up.
   In sales, persistence pays off it might take more than three calls to achieve the sale.
8. You are your financial security
   Have a respect for your finances.
   Pay yourself first.
   What can I offer that they are not offering.
   How can I add value, what is not yet available but valued
   Experience move and learn more.
   Wealth is a state of mind - rich and healthy thoughts
9. Remember where you came from
   Keep seeking feedback.
   Success is a moving clock - challenging a new time frame.
   Treat success with respect.
   Keep looking for new ideas.
10. Be a role model and a team player.
    Earn respect through graciousness.
    Be responsible to the team.
    …
    Equality of opportunity - the wellness and health industries.
    Give real incentive to all team members.
    We are interdependent - fitting in and standing tall.

Last modified 09/05/2006